A day, another busy day...

Arini sgt memenatkan, tp best :)
Pg td, ktaorg smua g KK Beserah..pg2 ada briefing pasal school health program, then, kitaorg smua mengubahkan bilik seminar kt ctu mjadi operation room C2 dlm ktaorg mengejar masa utk siap kan proposal presentation utk esk~ huhu..smua org sgt2 tekun n bsungguh2...I like :)
Then, at 3pm, kitaorg ada briefing ttg methadone program and hiv programs yg ada kt kuantan ni..then, balik uia..smpai imc at 450pm...then,kita, aj, wan kd and zarol, pi HTAA utk lawat makcik Robiah, pt kt KK Balok yg ktaorg wat homevisit...bila ktaorg smp je kt ctu, tpancar kegembiraan kt wajah mkcik tu...seriously, this is really2 wat kan sy sgt terharu..eventhough we just cameto visit her for a while, tak sangka doing sumting, as simple as coming to the ward, cn bring a smile to her face :) masa2 cmni la yg mbuatkan kita rasa bahagia memilih bidang ni :) really~ Thanks a lot to AJ, Wan KD and Zarol coz sgt2 baik, sgup pi lawat makcik tu dgn kita wlaupn msg2 kpenatan..korg mmg rock!!! :)
anyway, ni tgh kat meeting rum level 3 KOM, smua tgh berusaha wat part masing2 utk presentation proposal esk pg..chiayok2 smua...go,go C2!!!
P/S- harapan utk 'mkn sdap' tpaksa di-surpress-kan buat smentara waktu,coz sy bz and .......... No possible time for now, even weekend pn takbole gak...sob,sob ;(

XOXO, Me still busily waiting~

Past and Present...

I was a bit surprised when suddenly 'the dark side of my past' comes back haunting me, today..
Hmmm..why..? i really feel that it is disturbing...
I dont want to hv anything to do with 'that past' of my life.. It was a mistake, a foolish mistake, a dark dot in my blessful life...sometimes i regret for having that part of my life...tapi takpe la..life moves on, and so am i...dan saya sgt2 berani mengatakan, saya sgt bahagia skrg.... and i really dont want to hv anything to do with 'it' anymore...

The past was a foolish mistake..
A dark side of my younger years...
A part of my life that i really regret...
The part that i dont want to remember, dont want to know or even to hear anything about it anymore..
The part that i wish that i can delete forever in my life...
The part that really hurts, that had broken my heart into pieces....
Why should it come back to me after several years..after im happy with my present life..?
When im sure of myself, when i'm once again my true self...
I just want to tell 'that dark side of the past"...
It's all over..It's a history and it means nothing for me...
Coz now, im sure of my present...and i really hope to be my future..
My present life is such a bliss...
And I thank Allah for that..
For giving me this present of life.................
A gift that is priceless..one which i'll treasure for the rest of my life...
One that i hope will always be mine, till the end...

On request..shoudl i write about "gossip girl"...?hmmm~

Ada la seorg tu...dia suruh kita tulis pasal myself as a gossip girl..
Hmm, am i really a gossiper...?i dont think so...coz i know i cn keep others' secrets :) hahaha..
Tp kdg2 tu, trasa gak mcm gossip girl, sbb bk jugak la benda yg kita tau...hahaha :P
mestila sbb sy ada sumber yg sgt best ;) hehe..
tq la di atas 'perkongsian' itu...
wlaupun skadar berkongsi gossip, at least ada gk la benda yg di'share'kan...hahaha :P

Anyway, disebabkan permintaan (eceh,eceh..perasan la tu..xde la permintaan sgt pn...skadar percakapn je rasanye td tu...), this is what i cn write, as a gossip girl, who has been all the way along what u two have been going...to the both 'he' and 'she', this is for u :)

Other people may say that ur life are far apart...Two different worlds collide with another...
So very different from each other...
But the differences have been keeping U both together up until now...
Other peope might have said, U both are not suitable for each other..
But, what really suits the both of U, it's up for U both to decide....
Some people might say U are better than her, while others might say U deserve better than him...
But, really, it doesnt matter at all...coz they dont know both of U,
as much as U know her...as much as U care for him...
as much as she knows U...as much as he cares about U....

Mcari satu persamaan dlm seribu perbezaan...
Mcari ketenangan dlm kegelisahan...
Mcari kebahagiaan dlm kesamaran..
Mgkn tak mampu dinilai dgn cuma kata2...
Kerana mainan perasaan, adalah suatu yg tak pasti...
Mungkn dgn keyakinan hati, serta diiringi ikhlasnya doa drpd jiwa yg suci....
Sebuah mimpi bakal menjadi suatu realiti........

(U both = korang berdua la... U = him, U = her)
So, kpd korang berdua, I wish both of U, all the best tau...I'm always on Ur side...hahaha :P
P/s : sori la kalu tersinggung membaca post ni...this is what i really to tell to both of U

XOXO, still here alone but not lonely..

A day full of .....

This is about yesterday...smlm mmg la tsgt penatnye...disebabkan cwu tak siap,seminar pun xprepare, i didnt get enough sleep pn,cuma sempat tido kul430 smp 630..haha..dh la time tido tu mimpinye horror...mmg xnyenyak tido nye...so, esok nye tu, iaitu semalam pg, seminar pn dipresentkan dgn ntah ape2 je la...byk yg kita tak tulis, so, membebel la sorg2 kt depan tu..haha..kesian kat mrk2 yg mdgr..

Then, i tried to print out my cwu kat library,tp, malangnye, disebabkan matrc card xbwk,jdnye, xbole la nk print...waaaaa..stress btul..time tu dh pk mcm2, kt mana nk cr tmpt print lain,sbb library tutup kul12..seminar ktaorg start kul 1030 smp dkat2 pkul 1..huhu..tp, luckily, wan kd ada mjadi my heroin for that day,...kita print je pd wan kd...n she xnak kita bayar pape pn...baiknye ati wan kd..thanks byk2 ye wan kd :)

Then, ptd smlm ada islamic input..lpas je abis islamic input yg agak2 lama n xfaham sgt tu, maka sy pn pulg ke bilik dan apalagi, call mama n bergossip...haha...setengah jam tu duk berborak dgn mama...best sgt2..dh la dh lama xbalik umah...rindu sgt2 nk balik umah..

Hmm..ptgnye sy pn kluar dgn keadaan yg tiba2 n tergesa2 n sgt2 thrill sbb at the time i went out it was already 530, and we are supposed to be back at 6pm..hahaha.bygkan la betapa lajunye smua benda terjadi time tu..memang pecut abes la kira nye wlaupun xberapa pecut pun sbb most of the time tersangkut dlm jam...akhirnye, we only managed to be at IMC at 630pm..haha. stengah jam lambat...habis la..habis la :P
Anyway, tq ye :) really enjoy the rush~

So,malam nye, apalagi tido awal la..hehe...ni yg terbangun di kala subuh pn belum menjelma kerana terlebih tido :P hehehe..

XOXO, Yesterday is a day...

Arini g PSR =psychosocial rehabilitation=program sillaturrahim...hehe :) best sgt..sronok dpt tgk pt2 kt situ...kitaorg (budak2 kk balok) dpt pt nama kak musalmah...best sgt..hehe..kitaorg tlg kakak tu,dia pilih gambar2 dpd paper then ktaorg tlg dia tulis apa2 la yg bkaitan ttg gmbr2 tu...sronok la :)
Hmm...dlm pd tu, dsbbkan pjalanan pegi balik lma gak la, so, spjg pjalanan tu, apalagi, kita pn tido+berangan+berangan lagi spjg pjalanan tu...hahaha...
Hmm...nape la kita suka berangan ni...hmmm...

spjg pjalanan tu, terasa la kesepian, kesunyian, kesorangan...
betapa kosongnya hdup ni, bila insan yg memahami diri ini tiada bersama...
Bila tiada rakan2 yg sama2 memahami diriku ini, tiada di sisi...
Betapa diri ini terlalu merindui ,masa2 yg telah berlalu...
betapa diri ini mengharapkan semua yg berlalu sblm ini, berulang kembali, menjadi kenyataan..
bukan nya sekadar khayalan mahupun kenangan silam, kenangan yg tak mampu diri ini lupakan...

Tp, there is this one song yg sgt2 bermakna yg kita nyanyi je spjg pjalanan tu..haha.mcm org gila nyanyi sorg2...haha..
Why this song..? coz it really shows what i really hope to have..what i really want in life...and at the same time, it really tells that a girl is just a girl, not a perfect person....
This is the song, TAKDIR CINTA, Rossa...

ku tutup mataku
dari semua pandanganku
bila melihat matamu
ku yakin ada cinta
ketulusan hati yang mengulir lembut

Penguasa alam tolonglah pegangi aku
biar ku tak jatuh pada sumur dosa
yang terkutuk dan menyesatkan cintaku
andaikan ku bisa lebih adil
pada cinta Kau dan dia
aku bukan nabi yang bisa sempurna
ku tak luput dari dosa

biarlah ku hidup seperti ini
takdir cinta harus begini
ada Kau dan dia bukan ku yang mahu
oh Tuhan tuntunlah hatiku

penguasa alam tolonglah pegangi aku
biar ku tak jatuh pada sumur dosa
yang terkutuk dan menyesatkan cintaku

"dia=....." hahaha..my dear frenz ( u all know who U are,kan...) so, i think u all know sape 'dia' dlm lagu ni :P

XOXO, still dreaming, dont want to wake up yet...

Life & Love ~

It has been a while since i wrote anything on this blog.... Why...coz kita malas sgt2...sbb kita bz ( yeke bz...? hahaha) paling utama, sbb utama nye ialah...jeng,jeng,jeng....xtau nk ckp passal apa lg dh...haha...all the issues yg slama ni slalu kita tulis dh smakin subside...hahaha...dh jd less, and less important in my life...hahaha (ye ke makin 'less important'...?rasa ke'important'an nye kekal sama, malahan smakin bertambah...haha)
tp arini, i want to write in this blog, sbb, kita dh nampak sumting yg sgt2 special....
i saw what is love...real love...hmm..cinta sbnr, bukan skadar cinta yg bermain kat dpn mata...bukan skadar cinta yg bsandarkan pd kehendak hati, jiwa, nafsu semata2... i saw what is the real meaning of love....

How a guy really looks in a girl's eyes, and says " u are everything to me" without saying any word..
How a guy really smiles for a girl, how he really cares and how he really shows that she means the world to him....
How he really loves her, with all his heart, eventhough he does not say it out loud...
How he plans ahead for her, and includes her in everything in his life...
How he really wants her to be his, in the future, forever....

Ini memang a real love...bukan nye sekadar kisah dlm buku crita dongeng...bukan nye crita snow white or cinderella...bukan nye crita titanic pun...tp this is a real story...
and i hv the chance to see it live, in front of my eyes...
Mmg sgt2 sweet..
Mmg mcm fairy-tale,sweet sgt2...comel sgt....
I really2 hope, one day, i'll hv the chance to hv that kind of love...
For a guy to love me,whole-heartedly...
To be in his future, to be in his life, to share everything, anything....
But, to have such a great guy, with such a great love, i'll have to be a very good girl...which i really doubt, bolekah diri ini jadi a good girl...?? Hmmm.... That's a question for me to ponder...

XOXO, to be or not to be.....